Arachnid Assassination Plot FAIL

Clearly the world of creepy-crawlies could not let my gleeful post on Zombie fire ants go unpunished. While reading on-line responses to tonight's "Supernatural" finale (WOW!), I look up to see one of nature's stingiest arachnids attempting to nonchalantly scuttle into my bedroom. "It's just summer in San Antonio" you say? *shakes head* No, this can't be coincidence. They're after me. But, they will have to do better than a mere Infiltrator-Scorpion-Ninja-Assassin as he was easily foiled by a rear attack with a pair of needle-nose pliers.

Additionally, while I hate and despise scorpions to the extent seeing them fills me with more dread than other household creatures with more than four legs, I enjoy mocking their utter lack of hiding skills. No matter what surface they are on when you spot them, they always freeze like they still live in a world where "if I don't move, it won't see me" is an effective anti-predation defense. They could be on a brilliant chartreuse paisley-print pillow but upon being spotted, hold very still and act like eight-legged arachnids with curling stinger tails are always found on chartreuse paisley-print pillows, didn't you know? Silly scorpions. I wave my needle-nose pliers at you in defiance!

Of course, now I can't go to bed for a while....*clings to pliers*